Inflammation age 10: "HRV, you’re definitely 58% better than last year when your SNS was yapping 24/7. It’s been great spending more time with your PNS. By the way, from here on out, please refer to me as they."

VO2Max: "Inflammation, that last bit…what are you even talking about?"

HRV: "Honestly, if someone compares my SNS to my PNS one more time, I’m going to light this place up!"

Gray hair: "NAD, you pompous two sided di-nucleotide. You take a pill and then get all full of yourself. My situation is much more complex."

NAD: "Gray_hair, be like Epigenetic_age_42.5 who succeeded at 5.1 yrs of age reversal in 7 months last year. Turning back the clock back .73 years, each month!"

Gums, age 35: "I also want to remind everyone that it was split-personality-HRV that ruined me by forcing me to grind my teeth for 15 years, putting us on a path for our teeth to fall out and give us periodontitis. Even still, I figured out how to reverse our age by 5 years."

MaxHR: "I hear you…I’m working on it. I’ve improved 8% over the past year and am stalled as we try to figure out how to improve other parts of the heart."

Gray hair, age 60: "you guys are always so extra. How about sailing? A brisk sea breeze always refreshes."

NAD 51.2 umol/L, age 16: "Gray_hair, honestly, get it together and rejuvenate yourself. You’re making us all look bad."

Lungs FEV1 age 22: "That’s a great idea. I’m in. Hey Max Heart_Rate_183_age_37 can you step up your game today? We nearly had the boys beat until you tapped out the last 500 meters."

VO2Max 53.6 mL/(kg·min), age 18: "We did 3.27 miles in 33 min, climbing 1,000 ft. You averaged 159 bpm. A cool 170 bpm average would have done it. I have the capacity."